Tom Sandoval Apologizes to Ariana Madix After Affair: ‘I Was Selfish and Made Reckless Decisions’

Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix

Tom Sandoval is speaking out in the wake of his alleged months-long affair with his Vanderpump Rules costar Raquel Leviss, this time with an apology for longtime girlfriend Ariana Madix.

The reality star, 40, late Tuesday night shared a statement to his Instagram page addressing the end of his nine-year relationship.

“I want to first and foremost apologize to everyone I’ve hurt through this process,” he began. “Most of all, I want to apologize to Ariana. I made mistakes, I was selfish, and made reckless decisions that hurt somebody I love. No one deserves to feel that pain so traumatically and publicly.”

He continued: “I can only imagine how devastating this has been for Ariana and everyone around us. I feel really horrible about that. My biggest regret is that I dishonored Ariana. I never meant to disappoint so many people, including our loving families and friends.”

RELATED: Ariana Madix Doesn’t Feel Tom Sandoval and Raquel Leviss Have ‘Properly Apologized’: Source

Sandoval went on to reflect on his long relationship with Madix. “My love for Ariana was stronger than any camera could ever have captured,” he said. “Some of our best times together were never filmed. The same goes for some of our biggest struggles. I wish things happened in a different order and our relationship was not severely tarnished, and that it ended with the same respect for her that it began with. I owed Ariana better.”

“I am beyond sad that it ended the way it did,” his statement concluded. “The choices I made hurt so many people. I acted in a way that clashes with who and how I want to be. I will continue to reflect and work on myself. I have work to do. I always have, and I always will.”

RELATED: Tom Sandoval Says He ‘Deserves Your Anger and Disappointment’ After Cheating Scandal: ‘Sorry’

Ariana Madix attends the Friends and Family Opening at Schwartz & Sandy's with the cast of
Ariana Madix attends the Friends and Family Opening at Schwartz & Sandy’s with the cast of

Amanda Edwards/Getty; Emma McIntyre/WireImage; Charles Sykes/Bravo/Getty Ariana Madix, Tom Sandoval and Raquel Leviss

The apology comes less than a week after Madix discovered Sandoval had been cheating on her with Leviss after she found a recording of an intimate FaceTime call and “inappropriate” messages between the two on his phone while he was performing with his band, Tom Sandoval & the Most Extras, in Los Angeles on Wednesday.

“She was completely blindsided by this; devastated doesn’t even scratch the surface of how she feels,” one source told PEOPLE. “This is someone she thought she knew; someone she planned to spend the rest of her life with. You can’t even put into words that betrayal.”

By Friday afternoon, sources confirmed to PEOPLE that the two were done. They had been in a monogamous relationship despite rumors on the show otherwise.

The secret romance between Sandoval and Leviss has been going on “for upwards of six months,” an insider said — “all the while, Tom was sleeping next to Ariana in bed.”

“Ariana had been there for Raquel when she went through her split with James [Kennedy]. She thought they were friends,” a second source said. “This isn’t something you do to a friend.”

Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix of
Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix of

Robin L Marshall/Getty Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix

RELATED: Tom Sandoval and Raquel Leviss’ Affair Has Been Going on for 6 Months; Ariana Madix ‘Devastated’: Sources

The day after news of the affair went public, the Schwartz & Sandy’s owner issued a public mea culpa — though the statement made no mention of Madix and more directly served to protect his partners and employees at the L.A. restaurant.

“Hey, I fully understand and deserve [yo]ur anger and disappointment towards me, but please leave Schwartz my friends and family out of this situation…” Sandoval wrote, referencing friend Tom Schwartz, who he insisted “only found out about this very recently, and most definitely did not condone my actions.”

He also addressed taking a step back from the business and ended the note, “sorry for everything.”

RELATED VIDEO: Vanderpump Rules Stars Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix Split as Cameras Pick Back Up for Bravo Show

Earlier on Tuesday, a source told PEOPLE that Madix had yet to receive an official apology from her now-ex boyfriend and Leviss.

“There hasn’t been a sincere ‘sorry’ from either of them to Ariana,” the source said.

“It was all a bunch of excuses and projections — almost as if it was her fault,” the source added of the attempts made so far, both on and off camera, to explain what led to the end of Madix and Sandoval’s nine-year relationship.

The source had doubts Leviss and Sandoval would take ownership of their actions, saying, “Neither of them have yet to properly apologize and probably never will. These are two people who have no ability to take responsibility for their actions. They’re sorry they got caught — not that they did anything to hurt Ariana.”

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